Christmas
Carols for People with Interesting Views on Life
Schizophrenia -- Do You Hear
What I Hear?
Multiple Personality Disorder --- We
Three
Dementia --- I Think I'll be
Home for Christmas
Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald
Angles Sing About Me
Manic -- Deck the Halls and
Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and
trees and Fire
Hydrants
and......
Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me
Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
Personality Disorder --- You
Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout,
Maybe
I'll tell You Why
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells...
And for those of you who feel that I’m a totally insensitive cad for even daring to make a joke about potentially serious, life-limiting illnesses (and yes, these are illnesses folks…), here’s my follow-up:
The Psychiatric
Hotline
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line and we will trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press. No one will answer anyway.
**********************
Silliness aside, if you suspect that you or someone you know
may have an emotional disorder – prolonged depression included - that is
interfering with the ability to function “normally” and enjoy a reasonably
productive life, seek professional help
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