HOW TO HAVE A GREAT DAY
EVERY DAY
The following
article is taken from the
Every now and
again, old concepts rise to the surface in a new and glittery format. So it was
recently with The Secret, the book that spawned much brouhaha
including on "The Oprah Winfrey Show." Its central thesis was the
re-packaged -- but hardly new -- law of attraction. Roughly defined, the law
comes down to this -- your thinking can and does manifest what comes into your
life, such that positive thinking creates positive results and, conversely, negative
thinking creates negative results. A simple example: You know that
expensive white shirt you own? The one you are always nervous about spotting
when you wear it? And, "magically" you actually do get a spot on it
each time? Yet you don't spot the shirts you don't worry about. Funny isn't it?
Since tuning in to
the law of attraction, I have seen it play out not only in my own life but also
in the lives of those around me -- at work, at home and in the headlines of the
newspaper. It's amazingly powerful once you get the hang of it. It can totally
change your life. Want to know the secret? I asked life coach Lauren Zander (www.handelgroup.com) to help explain.
UNDERSTANDING THE PRINCIPLE OF MANIFESTING
The principle of
manifesting -- the act of creating a fully satisfying life through great
clarity in your thinking, your desires and in how you merge the two -- is one
Lauren fully supports. But it's not so easy. If it were we would all be walking
around with a million dollars in the bank. In her
coaching practice, Lauren has found the ability to manifest one's life to be an
incredibly powerful tool that goes well beyond the law of attraction. She
explains that the law of attraction focuses on what people wish would
happen and ignores what they actually think and feel about themselves, the
truths about how they feel on a deep level. As an example, let's say your
desire is to get a good job and you fantasize about doing so. But if lurking
under your wish are deep beliefs that no one likes you and you never get the
jobs you want, all the wishing in the world won't get you the job because the
real content of what you are manifesting -- that you are a loser -- determines
your outcomes.
This brings us to
the missing step in the law of attraction -- to reach your life wishes you must
first carefully and honestly search out who you are, and your history,
including what you really think and feel about yourself and your life. Only by
finding out what you don't like about yourself and your current life and
exploring your negative beliefs can you start to make changes. It is deep work,
says Lauren, but doing it matters because this is how you get to the place
where you can successfully manifest life the way you want it to be.
PREPARE THE WAY
Interestingly, the
wishes you have for your life are valuable as an important first indicator of
where you should start your work. The reason: Your wishes reflect the
areas where you can't even imagine yourself achieving happiness, your blocks in
life. If you honestly believed you could achieve these things, you would not be
making wishes, you would be doing it. For instance, let's say you wish you had
a happier marriage. But if in your heart you don't believe it is possible, you
are actually doing nothing or very little to bring it about. Most people focus
on why things are not possible. But, if you believe a happier marriage
is possible for you, you naturally picture what it would be like to create more
intimacy and fun with your mate and how you can have more enjoyment in your
life together -- and you would then start doing those things. Voila,
wish fulfilled.
In this process of
self-discovery, you work with what Lauren calls your real team players, your
mind and your heart. Your mind and your heart have very different jobs and must
come together as a team. Your heart will tell you your deep desires or wishes,
but you must listen to it without letting your mind make judgments or
criticisms about the message. Once you let yourself identify your heart's
desires, only then is it time to take on your mind. But be warned, getting its
cooperation is a challenge. Our mind is constantly busy, planning and worrying
in its role of protector to keep us on a "safe and careful" path
doing what we've done the way we've always done it. These ingrained defense
mechanisms are the inner voices that harp on us continuously to be rational and
sensible about life. We are not in the habit of forming new traits so much as
we are in the habit of defending old ones -- so manifesting takes us out of our
regular dialogue and starts us talking about what else is possible. To move
forward you must get your mind in alignment with your heart about wishes and
beliefs. You need to open your mind to see that your wishes are possible for
you -- yes, you -- to achieve, and with its help you will.
DOWN TO BUSINESS
Okay, now you are
ready for the next big step -- get rid of all negative thinking. Lauren has her
students keep "thought logs" to achieve this. For one week they write
down every negative thought they have, whether about themselves, others, even
inner nasty observances about people walking down the street. She reports that
this is usually a lot of fun because you start to see how ridiculous -- and
constant -- negative words make their way into your brain. The goal of the log
is to catch all negative thoughts as they start to form and turn them back --
in this case the old advice, "just say no," actually works. The mind
is always directing energy someplace and this is your first step in learning
how to direct it in positive directions. By heightening your awareness of the
negative behavior, you can catch it and stop yourself.
So now you know
what you need to work on and you are eradicating your negativity. You are ready
to begin the process. Again, this is deep work, but Lauren says it need not be
hard. The key is to keep at it, keep paying attention, and do not set time
lines or deadlines. What to do:
·
Set
aside time every day for manifesting. Just like a sport, this takes lots of
practice to get good at, so do it religiously. It will transform you from being
a novice into an expert. And don't worry about how long it takes -- it will
happen as it happens.
·
Keep a
journal in which you make note of what you want to have happen and what your
feelings are about it, including the fears you have and need to release. Can
you believe it is possible for you to get that new job? Or the new house? Or a
great marriage? Or a better relationship with your children? If not, why not?
Keep writing until you reach the point where you honestly believe achieving is
possible, says Lauren. It has happened to others, it can happen to you.
·
Start
with simple wishes and decide the actions and activities you need to do to get
your wish fulfilled. Then do them, including the ones that scare you, such as
asking for a raise or telling someone you are unhappy.
·
Write
in your journal every night to focus your current manifestations for the
future. Lauren, who has been doing this for years, says she can follow her
career path by reviewing past journals -- it is all there. Write how you feel,
the future you would like for yourself and then the actions that will direct
you to that place.
Lauren calls this
process the law of assumption, rather than the law of attraction. First you
create the belief in yourself that generates an honest assumption that you can
have the life you say you want to have -- you can see it, feel it, deserve it.
Then, and only then, can you manifest it into existence.
Copyright 2007 by Boardroom, Inc.
Reprinted with the permission of:
Daily Health News
Boardroom, Inc.
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