Fearing the Future ... I am what I fear!
 by: Edward B. Toupin

 

When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick our hands in the fire, chew on the beetle bugs, and eat that dirt. But, over time, we learned those things that we should not do through experience and from "parental voices" --- those baseless fears passed down through the generations. Later in life, we learned that fire burns, beetle bugs are "yucky" and dirt is not nutritious. But, we also learned all of the things that our parents learned, including their fears and phobias, and integrated those lessons into our own "belief systems."

 

Our belief systems are the basis of our personalities and the foundations of our directions in life --- they are the rules by which we live. In essence, our fears, desires, and values define each of us. We are what we believe --- including our fears. However, consider what your current fears are that prevent you from moving forward. Realize that these fears are of things that we were taught and those things that we learned on our own --- in the past. Fear is based on past experiences and not on those things that we have not yet encountered. With that, we only fear what we've "already experienced." The "fear of the unknown" is doubt in the future based on the circumstances that we've encountered in the past.

 

Since we are what we believe, we can change who we are by enhancing our belief systems. To overcome your fears, you must first determine if the fear is based on something learned through experience or taught to us by parental voices. Fears that are taught or passed down to us can be more prominent than those we learn from personal experiences because we don't know why we fear such things. We can overcome fears through rational thinking if we're able to learn why such situations occurred that caused the fear. But, if we don't know the basis, we won't look further because we fear what we "might" find.

 

If you don't know why you have certain fears and cannot rationalize them, they need to be eliminated. Baseless fears are unreal and create a false blockage and a reason to give up, surrender, and rest in a comfort zone. Determine which fears are baseless and replace them with practical experiences. Realistic fears based on actual experiences can be rationalized and resolved. These resolutions can then be integrated into our lives to learn lessons and move forward in life.

 

Once we are able to define and diffuse our core fears, we can then rely on the fear of returning to our prior state or not succeeding in our life to drive us forward. You can then devise a plan of action to reach your Vision and focus on desires of success and fulfillment instead of hiding in the dark from the empty fears of our "parental voices."

 

About The Author   Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics!   For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at http://www.make-life-great.com or http://www.toupin.com!   Copyright (c) 2004 Edward B. Toupin

 

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