THREE GREAT FEARS
By Bret Burquest
A prominent
Having
spent a life of change, rejection and failure, I tend to disagree. In fact, I’m
probably an expert in these three areas.
Change
isn’t exactly frightening, but it sure is irritating.
I’ve had 52
different addresses, in 12 states.
In college,
I majored in mathematics, trying to decide between architecture and geological
engineering. I ended up in computer science instead.
I started
my career as a computer programmer, only to be drafted into the US Army, where
I helped bring the Vietnam Conflict to a draw.
I returned
to my civilian job and later went back to college to get my Masters degree.
Subsequently,
I bounced from one computer job to another, working my way up the managerial
and salary ladder, until I finally became an independent contractor, where I
bounced even more often between clients and assignments.
Along the
way, I studied screenwriting and wrote three screenplays.
Somewhere
along the line, I was married for six years.
Not long
after I hit age 40, I quit the rat race and went off into the
After that
wore off, I wrote four novels, which were eventually published a few years
later.
Then I did
some more computer work during the Y2K era, followed by a stint with the 2000
US Census, started writing a newspaper column in 2001 and began teaching
college computer courses the same year.
Next year,
I may be a brain surgeon, rocket scientist or rodeo clown. I’ve had so many
changes in my life, I have to stick notes on my refrigerator to keep track of
who I am and what I’m suppose to be doing this week.
Change is
more troublesome than scary. It’s also a new challenge, a new start in life.
Perfection will never be attained and the outcome is never certain, but often
things can be changed for the better. If you can take a couple of steps forward
for every step backward, you're on the right path.
Rejection
isn’t very frightening either. You have no idea how much rejection you can
endure until you’ve written a few screenplays and novels. I have a stack of
rejection slips that weighs more than a peck of pickled peppers.
But if you
believe in yourself, you just keep moving forward with a positive attitude.
Nothing
truly worth achieving ever comes easy.
Being
rejected for your artistic expression by some unknown agent or publisher is one
thing, but being rejected by someone you’re attracted to is
hard to take. There’s nothing more humiliating than being seen as unworthy by
someone you admire.
But I don’t
allow rejection to upset me; I just assume the other person is a tasteless
idiot.
To fear
failure is to fear life. You can’t fail at something until you attempt to do
something. And when you finally get up enough nerve to try and fall flat on
your face, it usually means you’ve learned something.
You can’t
succeed without trying and almost everyone stumbles a few times along the way.
The more you fail, the more you learn, and the closer you are to success.
Change,
rejection and failure should be embraced, not feared. Confronting and
overcoming fear is how we grow stronger. After all, suffering builds character.
I have my
own set of fears. In no particular order, they include:
1) Women
2) Spiders
and snakes
3) Women
4) The edge
of a cliff
5) Women
I now
reside alone, deep in the boondocks, far from cliffs. Four
down and one to go.
___________
Quote for
the Day – "Our greatest fear is the fear to be our true selves." Bret
___________
***
Bret Burquest is an award-winning
columnist and author of four novels. Contact bret@centurytel.net
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