Random Thoughts of an Old (Weird) Geezer
Chapter 5
Some Folks Think too
Much
Especially about the past. They are continually dragging memories of the yucky events and situations out of the back of the file drawer. They’ll examine each little detail under a magnifying glass and relive all the poopy emotions they felt at the time the event occurred. Hell, they’ll even waste a ridiculous amount of time “what if’n” – wondering how things would have been different if they would have done something differently. Guess they don’t understand that we can’t change the past just by thinking about it. I think we’re better off to toss all our old garbage in the mental landfill, cover it with dirt and forget about it. It’s today we need to focus on. Plan for tomorrow, but focus on today.
And Some Folks Don’t
Think Enough
Yeah, we’re sheeple. We have a tendency to buy in to most of what we’ve learned, heard about or been exposed to over our lives. Sure some of this is good, useful information but a bunch of it is simply illogical and silly. We all would be better off if we would learn to question the information we’re receiving and take the time to figure out what makes sense and what doesn’t. Our brain is an amazing organ. A little more exercise would be good for it.
While I’m on the
Subject
Do not believe in
anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because
it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it
is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on
the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because
they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and
analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to
the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it. - The
Buddha
The Person I’d most
Like to Spend Time With?
The Dalai Lama. No, not to engage in an in depth discussion of the meaning of life or anything like that. Just to BS about life in general and some of the strange or funny things we’ve observed or experienced. From what I’ve read and heard, he’s a pretty kick-ass guy. I like people like that.
Speaking of Kick-Ass
The person who pops right to the top of my list is Jesus. Yeah, that one. If only half of what I’ve read and heard about him is true, I’ll still rank him number one. Setting the religious stuff aside, he set the standards on how the rest of us should conduct our lives. The original rebel with a cause! Sure, he pissed a lot of people off and paid for it dearly, but in doing so he has been a positive influence for millions of people. It doesn’t get any better than that.
A Favorite Saying
Thirty days hath September, April, June and no wonder. All the rest eat peanut butter – except Grandma, and she rides a bicycle.
This was one of those dumb things I picked up in my early college years and have never forgotten it. Guess it appeals to my warped little brain for some reason.
More Silliness
A polar bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a Scotch and… Coke.”
“Why the long pause?” asks the bartender.
“I don’t know,” says the bear. “I’ve always had them.”
From the September 2009 edition of Reader’s Digest…
Moving on…
I’ll Do It While I
Can
Like just about everyone else on this planet, there are some things that from time to time I don’t enjoy doing – or don’t particularly feel like doing at the time. Like what? Oh, like sweeping the driveway, trimming the bushes or cleaning out the garage. Things like that. But I go ahead and do them anyway. Without complaining. Why? Because I know that someday, I probably won’t be able to do these things. So I do them – and actually enjoy it – now… while I can.
Related to That
“Honey, would you get me a beer – or fix me a sandwich, or bring me my slippers or… ?” I can’t do that. I can’t ask someone else to do something for me when I am perfectly capable of doing it myself. I just can’t. It might have something to do with growing up on a farm and knowing that if something needed to get done, I had to do it. Ya gotta do what ya gotta do. I think I also view it as a sign of laziness. Sure, there are times when we really do need help with a task that might require three hands or another strong back. But when I frequently hear someone ask another person to be their go-fer, I really want to say, “Why don’t you get off your lazy ass and get it yourself?” I don’t say that because I’m not that kind of person. But I want to…
My Legs are Growing
Longer
Or my arms are shrinking, I’m not sure which one it is. All I know is that as I grow older, it has become harder for me to reach my feet to cut my toenails. It seems that the floor is further away too because it has become more difficult to bend over and pick up the gizmo that I accidentally knocked off the dining room table. There must be some statistics on this somewhere. I’ll probably find them out there on the Internet, huh?
And Another Thing
There are a whole bunch of companies out there that are screwing the damn bottle caps on tighter than they used to. I wish they’d quit that!
Neckties
Neckties are the dumbest use for a little piece of cloth that I’ve ever seen. Where the hell did we ever get the stupid idea that tying a hunk of cloth around a guy’s neck and letting it dangle down the front of his shirt is “professional”? OK, so I checked and sort of found out why we do it… but it’s still stupid. We humans are weird…
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