Grandchildren
My young grandson
called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and
I told him, "62."
He was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
After putting her grandchildren to bed for a sleepover, a grandmother washed
off her makeup, changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and began to color
her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience
grew thin. At last she stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with
stern warnings.
As she left the
room, she heard the three-year-old say in a trembling voice, "Who was
THAT?"
------------------------------------------------------------
A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was
like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire;
it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild
raspberries in the woods."
The little girl was
wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to
know you sooner!"
---------------------------------------------
My grandson was
visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how
you and God are alike?"
I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are
we alike?"
"You're both old," he replied.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor.
She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
-----------------------------------
I didn't know if my
granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point
out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me, and always she was
correct. But it was fun for me, so I continued. At last she headed for the
door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some
of these yourself!"
-------------------------------------
When my grandson
Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were
inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed
us in.
Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa. The mosquitoes
are coming after us with flashlights."
-------------------------------------
When my grandson
asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure."
"Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm
four to six."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma,
guess what? We learned how to make babies today."
The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said,
"How do you make babies?"
"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'I and
add 'es'."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher.
The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher asked, "Do you know what pregnant means?"
Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying a
child."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one
day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck
was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They
use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.
"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."
A third child brought the argument to a close: "No, they use the dogs to find
the fire hydrant!
Author/Originator
Unknown
NuPathz Home
Back to Still More Odds ‘N Ends
NuPathz.com
– Your affordable source for self improvement and self help books &
materials
Illuminating
the path for personal motivation, growth and development
SUCCESS
= TAKING THE STEPS TO DO THE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO!