Frank Feldman
A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just
going by. He gets into the taxi, and the
cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're
just like Frank."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab,
things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced
like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special.
Cabbie: "There's more... He had a memory like a computer. Could remember everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic
jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake and he
really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she
was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished
too - he was the perfect man! He never
made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet
him?"
Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank. I just married his f**king
widow."
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