41 Ways to Say Someone is Dumb
*****
Note: To view Gene’s Blogs posted before May 2010, just visit the “Articles” and “Odds ‘N Ends” sections of NuPathz at http://www.nupathz.com/
*****
Another Note: You can now catch me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/geneatnupathz (You may need to copy and paste this into your browser window to actually get there…) OK, whatever…
And yeah, I honestly do understand that at any given time folks are doing as good as they feel they can do, however… there are times when their actions or words may give a strong indication that (at that particular time) they are:
1. A few clowns short of a circus.
2. A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
3. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
4. Dumber than a box of hair.
5. A few peas short of a casserole.
6. Doesn’t have all his cornflakes in one box.
7. The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead.
8. One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
9. One taco short of a combination plate.
10. A few feathers short of a whole duck.
11. The cheese slid off his cracker.
12. Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
13. Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt.
14. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
15. Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
16. He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
17. An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
18. As smart as bait.
19. Chimney’s clogged.
20. Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash.
21. Doesn’t know much but leads the league in nostril hair.
22. Elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor.
23. Forgot to pay his brain bill.
24. Her sewing machine’s out of thread.
25. His antenna doesn’t pick up all the channels.
26. His belt doesn’t go through all the loops.
27. If he had another brain, it would be lonely.
28. Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
29. No grain in the silo.
30. Receiver is off the hook.
31. Several nuts short of a full pouch.
32. Skylight leaks a little.
33. Slinky’s kinked.
34. Surfing in Nebraska.
35. Too much yardage between the goal posts.
36. Big like ox, smart like tractor.
37. A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
38. The porch light is on but nobody’s home.
39. Running with one wheel on the ice.
40. A few cards short of a full deck.
41. As smart as a box of rocks.
******************************
And remember to take some time out every day just for you, to count your blessings, hug your loved ones and enjoy life’s wonders. I hope you have a really great day!
**DON’T MISS THE WRAP-UP “THOUGHT FOR THE DAY”!!!
ARE YOU READY FOR A CHANGE? Then be sure to check out the rest of our stuff (books, thoughts, quotations, links, articles, Words of Wisdom, Odds ‘N Ends, and much, much more) on our main site at: http://www.nupathz.com/ We have over 1000 pages of everything from videos, jokes, useless facts, bumper stickers and silly signs to humorous stories, off-the-wall thoughts and plenty of terrific articles to help you with your self improvement and personal growth efforts!
SAVE!!! DOWNLOAD ANY BOOK FOR LESS THAN TWO DOLLARS!
FREE 15 page previews on all books! Check ‘em out…
WANT TO KILL SOME TIME (and maybe learn something in the process)? Check out our referenced collection of over 1100 bits of trivia, useless facts and other fun, stupid or just plain weird stuff related to things you’ve been wondering about (or never thought of…) at Fairly Useless Facts! Just click on: http://www.fairlyuselessfacts.com
If you’d like to send a “Thank You” to a member of our armed forces overseas, you may do so at no charge by clicking on the following link: http://www.letssaythanks.com/ “Let’s Say Thanks” is a public service program from Xerox.
Would you like to DO MORE than just say “Thank You”? Then please consider sending letters and/or packages of needed products to our U.S. troops in harms way by visiting http://www.AnySoldier.com Any Soldier Inc is a totally independent, legitimate non-profit organization dedicated to making the lives of our service men and women just a bit easier. Stop by. You’ll see what I mean…
SEX AND VIOLENCE, WARS AND CONFLICTS! Think our lives are not heavily influenced by our basic animal instincts? Think again as you read through “JUST BETWEEN US CRITTERS” by Gene Simmons. It’s available at: http://books.lulu.com/gene-nupathz - and through the “Books” section of NuPathz.com at http://www.nupathz.cvom/newlit1.htm
* ”JUST BETWEEN US CRITTERS” is ALSO AVAILABLE through any major book retailer…
ISBN 1-4116-6176-1
MORE ABOUT “JUST BETWEEN US CRITTERS”
We are animals – mammals to be just a bit more specific. As a result, we arrive here on earth with essentially the same instincts for survival and procreation as every other animal. Whether we want to admit it or not, these instincts are frequently the driving force behind many of the things we do. Sometimes they serve us well by prompting us to make good decisions related to our well-being. If we’re not careful however, they might just drag us right into our very own alligator-infested swamp. “Just Between Us Critters” highlights how our instincts – whether we like it or not - can produce everything from international conflicts to corporate scandals and troublesome sexual adventures.
For a Quick Preview, click http://www.lulu.com/browse/preview.php?fCID=119028
OTHER BOOKS by Gene Simmons:
“Is This as Good as it Gets?”
ISBN 1-4116-4415-8
“What Am I Doing Here?”
ISBN 1-4116-4824-2
“Up Close and Personal”
ISBN 1-4116-5179-0
“Just Go For It!”
ISBN 1-4116-7577-0
“A Short Spiritual Journey”
ISBN 1-4116-8567-9
***FOR MORE INFORMATION on all books, just go to http://www.nupathz.com/newlit1.htm
SAVE!!! DOWNLOAD ANY BOOK FOR LESS THAN TWO DOLLARS!
FREE 15 page previews on all books! Check ‘em out…
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby
NuPathz.com – Your affordable source for self improvement and self help books & materials
Illuminating the path for personal motivation, growth and development
SUCCESS = TAKING THE STEPS TO DO THE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO!
JUST GO FOR IT!